Week Five – Dealing with Dissatisfaction

Data

Week 1  –  18 Drinks (0 AFD)

Week 2  –  21.5 Drinks (0 AFD)

Week 3  –  14.5 Drinks (3 AFD)

Week 4  –  26 Drinks (0 AFD)

Week 5  –  13 Drinks (3 AFD)

Observations

This week I drank 13 drinks with 3 alcohol free days. This has been my best week so far in terms of approaching sobriety. Health-wise I am feeling well with a noticeable decrease in heartburn and over all aches and pains.

I am aware of my triggers. I definitely connect watching TV with drinking. I also turn to drinking when I am feeling bored in the evenings. Alcohol seems to be a means of dealing with the feeling of dissatisfaction. That is, if I feel dissatisfied and drink I will feel less dissatisfied. I recognize this coping mechanism will work to keep me in dissatisfying situations because the alcohol in a sense makes me satisfied with dissatisfaction. As such I do nothing (besides drinking) to change the situation into a satisfactory situation. The use of Naltrexone works to counteract this dynamic by undermining the effectiveness of alcohol to mask the dissatisfaction. Accordingly it will theoretically make me seek other means of obtaining satisfaction.

That said, at this point I still feel that alcohol continues to work for me in masking dissatisfaction. This is true despite the fact that since I started with the Sinclair Method I am definitely drinking less and the pleasure associated with alcohol also seems to be less. It has only been one month so I assume this progress will continue as time passes. I know my use of alcohol is a deeply ingrained habit and not a moral failing. Perhaps the next step in the process is to start developing new healthy habits to replace the old unhealthy ones.